To complement Singapore's Medal Chances at the Olympics, yours truly presents the Top 10 event additions to help the country finally win more medals at the Big Games.
1) Cat Killing - First team to murder 5 cats and place them in a garbage can wins. Hypothetical National Mark - 27 seconds.
2) Longest Discussion centred on a Local Eatery - Hypothetical National Mark - 27 days.
3) Longest Conversation in English without a proper grammatical structure -Hypothetical National Mark - ongoing since the inception of the SAF.
4) The 'how many people can we squeeze into a lift (or MRT Train) before it explodes event.' - Feel the Japanese would beat us ou, but they are not in the Commonwealth Games, so a medal for us. Hypothetical National Mark - 37 Locals or the equivalent of 12 Expatriates.
5) Taxi Stealing. Conducted over 24 hours. Person who hijacks the most cabs wins. Bonus point awarded for thereafter Driving past the hijackee in said cab without acknowledging their existence.
6) The Television Quality Aversion Marathon. Judged by an international panel, the country whose terrestrial television network produces the most number of nausea induced fatalities across 24 hours, wins.
7) Heaviest Schoolbag carried by a child under the age of 12. Can be part of the weighlifting competition. Competitor must be able to walk 1km from Home to Bus Stop and remain standing for a duration of 20 minutes while on the moving bus.
8) Combined lowest Awareness levels while dancing in a night-club. Bonus points for remaining unenthused at higher blood-alchohol levels.
9) Longest Fingernail on a little pinky. Hypothetical National Mark - 1 metre. Bonus points for cleanliness and flexibilty.
10) Most Creative Rude Gestures out a Window while driving in a car. Points for Artistic Style can be awarded.
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Friday, October 06, 2006
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yenskie
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